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Happy Hour is for Amateurs - September 11, 2008

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Title: "HAPPY HOUR IS FOR AMATEURS"

The long awaited Philalawyer book, Happy Hour Is for Amateurs: A Lost Decade in the World's Worst Profession is being printed as you read this and will be available in bookstores on October 14, 2008. For those of you who can't wait that long, click the photo to purchase now from Amazon.com. Pre-orders should ship in the first week of October.

HappyHourHC_small.JPG

For some people, happy hour is never enough

This is a book about escape. It's also about laughing gas. And booze and dope and sex and every other vice millions of us indulge in to forget our jobs, the office, and the stifling, corporate caricatures we're forced to become for paychecks. This is a book about a decade lost in a senseless career no one likes and all the ridiculous things I did to run from it. In the end, it's probably your story as much as mine. We're everywhere. We just can't say it out loud.


Advance Praise:

"I was fired from my first legal job within a month, and this book explains why it was the best thing to ever happen to me." - Tucker Max, author of I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell

"A rollicking, booze-fueled joyride through the dark underbelly of the American legal system." - Frank Kelly Rich, Author of the Modern Drunkard

"Raucous, hilarious, and disturbing in all the right ways. I got drunk just reading this book." - A.J. Baime, executive editor, Playboy

"The Philadelphia Lawyer leaps off the page like a seersuckered superhero - a literary lothario Hunter S. Thompson would have been proud to call 'counselor.'" - Mark Ebner, co-author of Hollywood, Interrupted

"A Gen-Xer's satirical memoir takes sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll deep into the bowels of modern law. If justice is blind, then "The Philadelphia Lawyer" (a mysterious Pennsylvania blogger, true identity unknown) is the pop culture's new canine guide for the visually impaired... Sometimes sophomoric, but intensely insightful." - Kirkus Reviews


Legal Industry Buzz:

"The best book on law since that one by Grisham... the one where Samuel Jackson shoots the guy at the end." - Nancy Grace, CNN's Nancy Grace

"Vain and gaudy, yet glorious and vulnerable. A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man for lawyers." - Doug Llewellyn, The People's Court

"I haven't masturbated to anything this much since Caligula." - Justice Antonin Scalia, author of Making Your Case: The Art of Persuading Judges


Useful Reader Feedback:

"What makes this book so exceptional is this anonymous writer's amazing portrayal of the post adolescent, disillusioned and bored male. Some of the stories he recounts of law school and in the legal profession are among the funniest, and meaningful, stories that I have read in years. While they will undoubtedly offend prudes and the squeamish, I laughed and loved every minute I spent reading this book."

"It should probably be required reading for any college student considering law school. Men will either like this guy or not and the decision will be made. Women can be forewarned: get ready because this is reality. And perhaps that's what is most amazing about this book: a lawyer telling the truth."

"[The book] speaks to those legions of white-collar workers who find themselves trapped in a rip current of mundane, ego-driven office politics, motivated by little else than a desire to acquire enough wealth to escape, and burdened by the realization that the harder they struggle against it, the faster they drown."


Favorite Reader Feedback:

"Any good writing is overwhelmed by the sheer volume of distasteful stories, descriptions and frat boy musings that fill these pages. I couldn't finish it fast enough, and not in a good way. Recommendation: No, no, no!!!!! I felt as if I needed to shower after this book. It is vulgar, debasing to anyone mentioned within these pages, profane and really a disgrace to William Morrow, the publisher. This is a book to toss aside as quickly as possible, and if possible from great heights!"

"In the first two chapters, our hero ingests numerous narcotics and alcoholic beverages, 'dates' a number of women... and finds himself surrounded by the stupidest bunch of losers on the planet... I think I'll pass on the rest of the story. The blurb describes this as 'outrageous, juvenile, raucous, and entertaining.' At least they got the 'juvenile' part right."

"...[T]he reader treats us to the story of how he has wasted his life using drugs and alcohol, all the while feeling superior to anyone who might actually be trying to earn a day's pay... Isn't that special?"

Posted by Donika at 10:49 AM

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Comments

Just pre-ordered off Amazon. All along I'd assumed Scalia was a frotteurism guy. My world view is now shattered.

PL: That was O'Connor. She was known to ride a clerk's knee like a Sybian.

Posted by: bumptious96 at September 11, 2008 12:51 PM

Awesome. I cannot effing wait to read it.

PL: I'm thrilled to put it out.

Posted by: Rhett at September 11, 2008 12:54 PM

1. Why are there so many reviews up on Amazon already? Where did those people get a copy?

2. It's not being published under PhilaLawyer's real name?

PL: Advance rough copies were circulated. Industry standard practice. Well, except for it being inadvertently sent to a few highly sensitive types. There are a few reasons for the name appearing as it does, marketing oriented stuff you'll see in coming weeks/months.

Posted by: Chris at September 11, 2008 01:11 PM

Congrats. Reserving time in my appointment calendar for a trip to Borders on 10-14... (yes, I have to schedule these things, isn't hourly billing grand!)

PL: Billed to "research," no? Thanks.

Posted by: FrattyLite at September 11, 2008 01:25 PM

I really like the negative reviews of the book- they all sound like they're written by the sort of people I wouldn't piss on if they were on fire. That tells me I should really pickup a copy when it comes out.

Congratulations.

PL: Let's just say advance rough copy of the book was inadvertently shipped to certain people a bit conservative for its content.

Posted by: Antony at September 11, 2008 01:32 PM

Will this be available in Kindle format?

PL: Don't know. My guess is yes, I think everything new is now.

Posted by: Steve at September 11, 2008 01:33 PM

Excellent, can't wait! Any idea when it'll be out in the UK?
If I were in charge of a University, I'd make Tucker's work recommended reading for freshers and yours for final years.

It speaks more clearly and concisely about the importance of discovering and doing what you love rather than what will make you money than any number of career seminars could.

PL: Amazon's UK site says December.

You can order it from the US a lot faster, however. And cheaper, I'd imagine, considering the dollar.

Thank you. I hope people take that message from the material. Among others...

Posted by: Richard at September 11, 2008 02:46 PM

Looking forward to it. I'm going to have to wait until the weekend of the release to read it. Kind of afraid it would motivate me to quit my job and walk the earth.

PL: That's my dream. I have to find a profession that lets me travel endlessly. So much to see.

Posted by: Matt at September 11, 2008 02:58 PM

Pre-Ordered as soon as I got the email.

Holy shit, I can't wait.

Posted by: Luke at September 11, 2008 03:56 PM

So, are you ever gonna pull the trigger and quit being a "fucking office jockey"?

PL: To the extent that what is monetized is always business, even art, I'll always be an office jockey of some sort. We all are.

Posted by: Anon at September 11, 2008 04:01 PM

I also want to add that reading through the Amazon reader reviews...it's too apparent that the readers just dont *get it*.

They expected a book that would tell them about the thrilling daily life of a lawyer, but instead got the cold hard truth about the man behind it.

I guess we are just desensitized by having read every blog post and view the content differently, either that or the reviewers just need a stiff drink.

PL: Some of them had valid criticisms. The ones who merely hated the substance, well, some folks have trouble with racy stuff. I don't know why, but it made for some funny comments.

Posted by: Luke at September 11, 2008 04:04 PM

Mine has been pre-ordered for a while already. Congratulations. There is a reason why I compared you to Page. He is someone I consider to be a master at his art. Your writing is great stuff (and I ran from a white-collar silicon valley engineering gig to something a lot more meaningful, so a lot of your work resonates).

PL: I don't know where that comes from but you've always been on to something with your music analogies. I was listening to Johnny Cash earlier, this version of an old Cat Stevens tune he does with Fiona Apple. His voice is shot and Rick Rubin's arrangement and choice of Apple to compliment Cash are iffy. Still, when the old man wheezed I was transported, just for a second, to a point somewhere outside my car, away from the traffic lights, business considerations and everything else. For a split second the guy connected with me (I know this sounds a little sappy, but it's important shit...). I got a fleeting sense of how it must feel to be facing a downhill run like he was when he sang the tune and in that kind of moment, I think I got the "resonance" you're referring to.

Writing this stuff for these years hasn't been easy. I've stayed up nights and imperiled my relationships and taken some crazy risks attendant to this endeavor, and who knows - the book might blow. But the idea, the notion, that in some little way some silly rambling of mine might have approached the sort of "connection" one gets from listening to a real, actual serious talent like Cash makes it worthwhile.

We can all get coarse and pragmatic about so much shit around us. We can think life is hard and shitty and mean and we'd be right. I've written some awfully mean and bitter humor here and I intend to keep doing so. But there are those reminders that every second of our lives isn't monetized, that we're not perpetually stuck in a crazy merry go round where we work/spend/work/spend and listen to the news tell us how we're all going down like Old Rome. That we can "stand athwart" the forces around us if we want to for just a second and be somewhere else, be taken above and outside the niggling shit pestering us from so many angles. In its capacity to free us even momentarily, just sitting at a stoplight and listening to music, I think art's a hell of a seditious thing. I'm glad of the chance to throw some of my musings into that anarchic wavelength... See if they can ramble around the ether a bit, maybe catch fire somewhere. Or just make you laugh.

Posted by: Long time reader at September 11, 2008 04:04 PM

You know, I've been reading your stuff for a long time. You'd go through all the motions as you just did, but while admitting that you yourself are a part of it. It might be because you're a walking hypocrite, or it could be a profound example of the turmoil and inner conflict of the average white collar male (I see it as both). Whatever it was, I liked it.

I'm not so sure of the current tone, though. It's like you're saying you're better than all of it, because you're looking for your ticket out (after a decade of 'service') while others spend the rest of their lives sharing the same discontent but realizing they have few other options. Is the entire book going to be in this 'holier than thou' attitude full of mischaracterizations and broad assumptions? Instead of quoting reviews or a passage your editor whipped up, why don't you tell us what the substance of your book is?

PL: That bitterness will eat you alive. As one who's suffered ulcers because of it, I can tell you - let it go.

The book's primarily a piece of humor about exactly what the title says. It's a blend of old and new material, all woven into a narrative loosely covering the time period referenced. In layman's terms, a pack of drunken fuck stories tethered around a broader social satire, marbled with jokes and criticisms about the modern working condition.

Readers can take it positively, or you can be challenged by the questions it raises or you can get angry about it.

By the way, these mythical "others"... What keeps them from other options?

Posted by: notion at September 11, 2008 04:41 PM

Just pre-ordered. First book I've ever been excited to get my hands on. Your writing has sent shivers down my spine many times.

PL: For the 100th time, it isn't my writing. It's the recognition that you'd have written and have probably thought many time exactly the same things. But thanks.

Posted by: WDL at September 11, 2008 05:57 PM

While we're on music analogies, the peaks of your best stories evoke the climax of "Sway" where Kieth yells "hey, hey, hey, now." Best moment of a great album.
Along with amusing me, your writing has helped make me a more impulsive person, prone to instant gratification and abandoning the notion of sacrificing time and youth to wait for some vague future when things will be "just great." While those sound like negative qualities to most people, I enjoy my life more now, and I'm far, far less frequently disappointed. Why worry about being rested for class, or being a nice person, when sarcastic, drunken charm can lead to me bed with one girl after class, and other at the end of the night? Whatever the consequences of actions, your writing has shown me that if you enjoy yourself, that is certain and tangible... Meanwhile I'm still taking six and a half classes towards 3 majors at Wharton and the college. A hedge is always nice.
I'm going to make a stink at the library and convince U Penn to order a copy or two. Do you have any book signings in Philly coming up?

PL: I'd love to say otherwise - that being nice gets one ahead. You're right. It doesn't. Still, remember this... When you're trying to hook up with women in a few years and you've gotten the wild oats out of the system, don't screw up and miss a good one chasing volume. Just a little reminder. I got lucky and found a fun chick. If you meet a chick and she's as much fun as hanging out with friends, don't screw it up. And keep this in mind. As you get on in years, the drunk thing isn't as funny to women as it is through age 29. Other than those friendly cautions, have at it.

As to book signings, my marketing people are figuring that out. We'll announce as that stuff firms up. More of bar thing, I think, hopefully in conjunction with Maker's Mark.

Posted by: Julian at September 11, 2008 07:14 PM

"and finds himself surrounded by the stupidest bunch of losers on the planet..."

Wepons grade bolognium my man! The person who wrote that is probably my secretary or the guy who details my cars...

Man, my indignation button is on a hair trigger these days. I've gotta put that cracker back in my truck!

Speaking of being a losers, I can't believe you suggested I should buy that overpriced "Dodge" CL65 yesterday! You're an irresponsible friend. That said, I'm still dying to get a mid '80s Countach... PIZZA! PIZZA!

PL: No shit. I considered myself a fairly intelligent loser. Nothing fancy, but I could solve a Rubik's Cube in an hour.

Fuck carrying a cracker... Have part of the nitrous line from the engine routed into the cabin. So it's industrial grade... It'll be properly diluted when it mixes with the air conditioning. This is why I told you to buy a CL instead of a SL. You'd have to drive to Canada feel anything with all the leakage in a ragtop.

"Sir, why were you driving with your head between your legs?"

"That's where all the really cold gas... er, air is."

"Excuse me?"

"I'm Inuit. The heat kills me."


Posted by: Rosie Palmer at September 11, 2008 08:25 PM

I guess I was in kind of a shit mood when I wrote that. I'm definitely buying the book--maybe I'm just a little antsy because you've been saving the good stuff for the novel, and I haven't had my fix.

I actually don't know much about the 'others', but I'm definitely headed down that path. It's funny, I was in my poly-sci class today (couldn't think of a better way to blow a few grand) and she asked me why I'm interested in majoring in Finance. I took a second, and spat out "Money." She asked why.. I cam up with "Creature comforts." I'd like to think I was only half-joking, but if I'm going to take what you're saying to heart, what else is there? You present a lifestyle characteristic of disillusionment and unhappiness and show us an alternative that few can achieve (I'm a decent writer, but I don't see any book deals in my immediate future). Maybe I'm looking for answers where there are none.

PL: I don't know how to explain this because it's real subjective... I'd be a silly ass to say I don't want creature comforts. Hell, everyone does. But there's a way to find a balance.

There's nothing wrong with going into finance. Shit, that's what I'd have done if I were young and could talk to the dumb drunk asshole I was at twenty two. I'd have had some balls and gone for it. I don't regret how things panned out since, but with the serious money one can make in finance there's freedom very, very few lawyers will ever know. And you might like it.

Law's a piecemeal industry for most lawyers, an idiot's business model. By the time I was old and smart enough to take a risk and shift to a different model I was already too sour on the sleaziness of practicing in the city I was in to care anymore. That and I always had a book in my head.

You? You're young and the value of direction at 20 is 10X that of direction in your thirties. If you're not sure on finance, take a chance with it and if it doesn't suit you keep researching some other job you might like and always, always be prepared to take chances and shift on a moment's notice. It gets harder when you get older.

People will make you feel like your options are limited at your age. They're cynics. We're headed into a scary, crazy economy for the next ten years, I think something along the lines of Japan in the 90s. In that panic and fear is a lot of opportunity for people with energy and the ability to shift jobs quickly and manipulate circumstances.

I'm amusing and funny and I got to take a risky at shot at a dream job, but it wasn't easy, and no one should try to follow my lead of being an escapist fool. The real escapists are the guys who don't box themselves in the way I have - the people who don't take the easy, risk-free keep-me-in-golf-course-money route like law. Stay debt free and take risks. And don't listen to people who'd tell you otherwise. You only live once.

I don't believe in any of that afterlife stuff...

Posted by: notion at September 11, 2008 10:35 PM

I don't think I've ever been so excited in my life. I started reading your page and got hooked. To think the book is finally out is astounding.

PL: Well, still a little while left, but you can order it. But thanks.

Posted by: Patrick Martin at September 12, 2008 03:23 AM

thanks for the cautions, I take them seriously. Luckily, I still have almost a decade before 29, and I'll be as irresponsible as I can get away with for at least the first half of it.
Volume is only an interesting option in that its exciting and uncertain. Its not conquest or high fiving frat buddies about the "chick I nailed!" It leads to more freedom in where I end up, being at the disposal of whims and odd circumstance to lead my night in directions that are often foreign and great. I can chuckle in retrospect at the day to day reality of my life. Nothing more tedious and depressing than routine at this age. It's a lifestyle I have the energy and drive for now, but I can't and don't want to maintain those forever. It will pass, hopefully I'll have the maturity to know when to let go when its time.

As for the Maker's, I'm looking forward to it, tho I still think Bulleit is better for the price.

PL: Many booze critics agree. I think Bulleit's a bit flat, but it's all a matter of taste.

Posted by: Julian at September 12, 2008 11:39 AM

"PL: Let's just say advance rough copy of the book was inadvertently shipped to certain people a bit conservative for its content."

Is that why I didn't get a copy??

Congratulations!

PL: Thanks. I'd barely had one at that time. I saw the first review - a positive but still critical one which was very well done - and was confused as hell.

Posted by: Evil Conservative at September 12, 2008 03:16 PM

"In layman's terms, a pack of drunken fuck stories tethered around a broader social satire, marbled with jokes and criticisms about the modern working condition."

I still don't understand how anyone that reads your site wouldn't get that the description above is what the book is about, respectively. I don't reckon I'll be picking it up and come to some glorious realization about life. I expect to laugh, nod my head a lot, hit the sauce afterward, and take solace in the fact that someone I identify with found an outlet to get out of this god damn Mon-Fri death march that most of us have stuck ourselves in. I'm also a little jealous, so fuck you if you somehow make it big. I'll just get belligerent drunk and pound out a scathing review of it on Amazon if the sales start getting too high.

I also don't think you're walking around thinking your hot shit giving yourself the guns in the mirror every morning just because you point out the absurdities of people. You have a piece about getting pumped up for litigating by rocking out an ABBA song for shit sake (That made me feel better about my love for 'Tonight She Comes' by The Cars).

PL: In fairness, that guy did later state that he was in a bad mood at the time he posted the comment. I know that feeling myself.

"Court Jester" - that was one of the original titles of the book and I think that describes me pretty well.

As to the Cars, I'm still mourning Benjamin Orr. Poland's finest rhythm guitarist.

Posted by: Matt at September 12, 2008 03:21 PM

I've been reading your website since day 1 and have loved it. I can't wait to get my hands on this book and will be pushing it on all of my friends to read.

PL: Thanks. That's how this thing will sell. It doesn't lend itself to much in the way of simple marketing. It can be appreciated on several levels and is aimed ambitiously at a broad age group. It's a word of mouth book ultimately. I'm going to remind readers here about that as the marketing goes out in the coming months. The different pitches will be aimed at different sectors of the audience and no one should assume the book is a certain "type" of material based on a single piece of marketing. It's not War and Peace, but it's not just a pile of sarcastic, satirical observations and jokes either. There are some serious polemic elements, and there is a message. I think the book is, to reluctantly borrow a term used by pompous asses, sui generis.


Posted by: David at September 12, 2008 07:13 PM

After the book gets published, will you be emerging from behind your curtain of anonyminity? I'd be nice to have a face to go with the writer who has dramatically changed my life. I can completely understand if you don't want to give your identity away, but I'll still be disappointed.

At the very least, you should do some sort of book signing tour.

PL: The marketing people are lining up appearances. I think at bars, but I'm also trying to line up speaking engagements at colleges. I think that'd be a great place for a back and forth. If I can offer good info to a couple kids at the outset to help them not make the mistakes one can make about selecting career at that age that'd be incredibly gratifying.

I don't know how far I'll travel, but if the right sort of people want me to come and speak or just have drinks, I'm happy to do it. How that jives with the anonymity thing I don't know. Guess we'll learn that on the fly...

If you're in NYC or Philly area or DC, there'll be an opportunity for us to meet.

Posted by: JuXtaposed at September 13, 2008 11:59 AM

Hrm, a bastard like myself fresh out of college might find some enjoyment here. Here's hoping I get entertained and not all jealous and pissed off that I spent the best years of my life scared on the sidelines.

I've been fighting that feeling ever since I discovered our blog Senior year. I'm pretty sure I not the only one out there who graduated feeling lied to.

Move over kerouac!

PL: Loads of time to make up for anything missed.
Just stay the hell away from law school.

Motherfucker... Is there anything worse than seeing Notre Dame win? Charlie Weis is a such an obnoxious, bloated bag of shit.

Maybe Duke basketball, but it's close...

When you start working, remember this ratio: 3:1. The book explains why/how. I'll raise this beer to hoping you never have to use it.

Raison D'Etre. A damn tasty brew.

Posted by: Tone at September 13, 2008 04:11 PM

Finance is a good field and I highly recommend it...as long as you have a backup plan ready at all times, which I'm sure Lehman's employees are reverting to as I type.

PL: Japan, 90s. It's coming.

Posted by: Tim at September 14, 2008 09:26 PM

Shoot, if you're going to appear at bars and colleges, I'd be interested in seeing a schedule (if and when that's worked out - may I suggest Ann Arbor?)

PL: Not if you keep losing to Charlie Weis... There'll be a schedule, fluid, but you'll know when/if I can be in a locale that far away.

Posted by: Rob at September 14, 2008 09:52 PM

Um, so you mean I won't be like Dylan McDermott on the 'The Practice', or Matlock if I go to law school?

All joking aside, your writing has made me question why and where the next step after graduating from college will be. Thought the legal assistant route before law school would be "the right thing". This blog has shown that the right thing, can be the right thing to make you miserable.

PL: Try things. I actually liked the arguing and stuff like that, and I was a decent writer, which made some brief-writing tolerable. It's the business that's loathsome, and most notably the types it attracts. There's this awful suspension of disbelief that goes along with being an advocate. It can drive you a little nuts after a while. Business is of course war by another name, but in law, advocates take the position that they are on the side of truth and justice and it's not true at all. At least half of the lawyers in any courtroom are lying in some fashion. If they weren't, the disputes wouldn't be in court. Yet they'll all claim to be on the side of right against wrong in every one of their cases. That can do strange shit to your psyche.

But try it. Don't let me be the reason you don't. Never make a decision solely based on info from others. Take a look for yourself because you're the only one who'll know whether something's the right move for you. Just don't spend a pile of money in law school as a form of "trying it." Work in a firm as a clerk or something like that for a while. Observe the business. If nothing else, talk candidly with many lawyers from different areas. I know it from the litigation perspective, in a city notorious for its type of litigators. You might find a different area appealing.

But never spend the money on school - in law or anything else - until you're sure.

Posted by: newgrad at September 14, 2008 11:04 PM

I read your posting on your website for a while now and I have to say, I cannot wait for the book to come out. Working in insurance sucks the soul out of you and your writing gives me hope that there is the possibility of escape, though temporary. Congratulations and I hope the book does well.

PL: Thank you, and I hope you're working for AIG right now.

Posted by: Smitty at September 15, 2008 01:50 PM

The Japan redux argument has a lot of valid points...I think the intervention Washington wants to do in propping housing and keeping rates low will just prolong the pain. This whole idea of it suddenly becoming a constitutional right to own a home, regardless of income, direction of rates, job security, etc is ridiculous. That will only prolong the pain. If we can continue to have firms fail, have assets marked down, and have losses owned up to, then we'll avoid the Japan dilemma. LEH, etc. should've marked down when MER did it a in July. They didn't and now they've paid the price, mostly due to Fuld's arrogance.

PL: Paulson did the right thing. If he bailed Lehman he was going to find the Fed bailing out Merrill soon enough. Instead, the Lehman mess ushered in the BofA/Merrill marriage. Congress will not do the right thing with the auto makers.

Posted by: Tim at September 15, 2008 04:42 PM

First, just want to say that I can't wait to read your book as I've enjoyed your website for years.

Having come from a what I think is a fairly similar background to yours (high school in the philly suburbs, spent many summers drunk at the jersey shore, drunken fraternity brother at a PA state college who fits right into your slacker template from the beginning of the law school primer post), I was wondering your opinion on a few subjects...
1) One of your posts mentioned talking to a career counselor about getting into sales and marketing, but you were told that litigators were by nature undesirable and their skill set is paid for when needed. What's your opinion of sales and marketing, do you think you'd have been a lot happier if you got into it? I'm interviewing around now, just wondering if you knew anyone who got into the field and how they feel about it 10 years on. Stable? Happy? Miserable? Broke? Not getting anywhere or moving on up Good Times style? I know that's pretty broad and it all depends on the type of person, but hell if I can find an unfiltered no-BS answer from anyone I talk to now.
2) What's your opinion of Manayunk? 75% of the people I know migrated there after graduation, I'm thinking of the move but the yuppie/gentrified atmosphere is a little off-putting. I've gotten drunk on main street plenty of times and as good as it looks I still don't know what to make of the place. It's like college with the age group moved up to mid 20s. What are some good places to think about moving to in Philly when you're just starting off in the "professional" world?

PL: Sales is a tough gig. You have to be tenacious as hell. I've done it inside and outside law. In law it's not too hard because the client needs the service. Outside, without that immediate need, selling a product someone can get from many other sources, it's hard, but rewarding. It's a lot more talking than sitting around at a desk. More meetings and driving, etc... I enjoyed it, but I had the luxury of doing it with decent leads. I couldn't imagine having to go out and run down my own leads.

Manayunk's nice. I like the sushi place in the center and Grape St (if it's still there) is a great bar. There was also a great dive bar under the train tracks. I haven't been there in about two years, but I recall it being a pretty good mix of local color and yuppies with a few artsy types and college kids thrown into the mix. I always had fun there. Best neighborhood? I'm a lazy shit, so I'd say get close to Rittenhouse or Old City and surrounding area. You're near everything.

Posted by: Jon at September 15, 2008 05:22 PM

Ha, as a displaced Spartan I'm no fan of Weis or the Wolverines. But thanks, I'll be sure to keep an eye on the site. Also, can't wait for the book.

PL: Penn State/MSU 2007 - Ugliest game in years.

Posted by: Rob at September 15, 2008 08:24 PM

Oh polar bears, mouth like a vacuum. Great writing, I thoroughly enjoy learning about how much I don't want to go into Law, damn you Boston Legal for only showing the cum shots. That aside, I'll be avidly reading your book and praying (but maybe I should do something useful) that there won't be a dry spell from the updates when I'm done.
Happy day is for pros.
Cheers

PL: Thanks. As to the updates, we have material. A new piece will run tonight or tomorrow. We're just figuring out how to run it in conjunction with the book announcement.

Posted by: Fellow 10%er at September 16, 2008 01:24 AM

Don't even get me started on the automakers. It makes me sick. Rick Wagoner is a disgrace. A fucking disgrace. Where else can you drive your company's stock to a 52 YEAR low, blame it on unforeseen events, and have the board say they don't care and get a massive loan from the government? It's ludicrous.

PL; The company should be forced to break up. I don't know if this could be done because their product lines share a lot of components, but it seems right that the company be forced to sell off its better units, like Cadillac, GM Trucks and parts of Chevy, which actually make good products.

Posted by: Tim at September 16, 2008 06:38 AM

Enjoy it while you can, Phil, because if the Jesus Crowd that you and yours are selling out to for a 30 pieces of silver tax cut have their way, this time next year you'll be tearfully confessing and repenting on live teevee to a celebrity panel made up of John Hagee, James Dobson, and Fred Phelps on a Fox reality show called "Which Sinner to Smite?" I just hope for your sake that the call-in voters find Julia Allison's blog more offensive.

Maker's would be a good sponsor, btw,

PL: Do you recall the last line of "A Clockwork Orange"? There's a bucket of money in professional repenting. Is there a better racket than stealing from those degenerates? "Oh, ahhh am saved. I have felt the power of the Lurd!"

Knob Creek balked at us. Said we weren't post-ironic enough.

Posted by: Bob at September 16, 2008 02:16 PM

PL-Long-time fan, read you in 04 when at a horrible Houston-based firm. Looking forward to the book, I find it amusing that some of the reviwers seem to think you made up or embellished the stories. Kind of the reaction I got from some of my fellow associates I referred your blog too. Let's just say--to paraphrase Cobain, they are not like me and were not amused! They simply cannot put their mind around the concept that when as HS juniors they were sneaking liquor from their parent's basement bars that I was buying 8-balls of blow direct from the Columbians in Jackson Heights and partying in underground clubs into wee hours of morning.

PL: Jesus, you were a lot more hardcore than I was at that age. But that hits the real thrust of the book... Not a lot of people are closet libertines, but the percentage who are is not insignificant. And yet no one admits it. We all pretend everybody's a teetotaler. Strange judgmentalism in this country. We're all so fixated on values, and yet the more we look around, everything proves people are so much more nuanced than that...

Posted by: subrogated self at September 16, 2008 06:29 PM

i'm probably the only Kinesiology major that has read every article on this site religiously. I have learned so much from you. I switched into Sociology last Friday and threw away my chances of graduating in 4 years. But you know what? Who gives a fuck. I'm spending a fuckload of dad's money, but I'm sure as fuck not wasting a cent of it. Your attitude and writing has influenced my way of thinking, and it's why I'm taking the classical tradition, a japanese language course, and a grab bag of all sorts of bullshit. There shouldn't even be a choice, dumb ass high school grads looking at college should be forced into general studies their first year. I think what I really want to do is become a prof (and take the ass raping that comes with getting a PhD), but at least i'm smart enough to know that I may find a different route even now. It sounds like a stretch to say I learned about all this stuff from a blog like this, but you definitely had a huge part in helping me see what my priorities are. Hopefully I can get the fuck out of the country before my generation starts to really fuck shit up.

Good luck on the book, I'd buy it just for the articles you took off the site. I'd definitely travel to meet you, and i won't bother asking you to come down and visit this shithole of a town (u of i urbana-champaign).

PL: Jesus, man. Thanks. That's awfully kind.

As to sociology, if you ever want to write an article about the fragile male ego that sits at all of the problems I see in law (and we're now seeing on Wall St), let me know. I think that, along with sexual puritanism and its attendant frustrations (often channeled into fundamentalism), is one of the most destructive and annoying forces in the universe.

Posted by: Kakutogi at September 18, 2008 03:07 PM

I'm actually irritated this isn't out yet and lots of the old stories have been taken down. There's truly nothing better to read than Philalawyer when you're sitting at a mind numbing tradeshow watching soulless sales weasels and herd logic customers walk by.

PL: I'm getting a new piece of the old variety up by week's end. My editor and I have been a bit bogged down, however, with book stuff.

I suggest buying one of those little TVs and watching the bobble-heads on the Hill try to kiss their constituents' asses and score political points arguing over the bailout.

There's an absurdity in watching Barney Frank rip into what he thinks are the specifics of the structure that John Cleese and Eric Idle couldn't replicate.

Posted by: Guy Fawkes at September 23, 2008 05:04 PM

Did you come up with that title?

PL: Why?

Posted by: Jake at September 29, 2008 10:21 PM

Because it's a spin on a worn-out phrase: ____ is for amateurs.

...and isn't the whole point of your book that, except for the 10-percenter type people, Happy Hour is actually for professionals? Amateurs don't do happy hour. They go out and have legitimate fun that builds relationships with people that they have real fun. Happy Hour is for professoinals, the kind that only want to go out for tapas on Friday at 6:30, talk about something intellectual but not too controversial (with the wine glass stem dangling through the fingers of course) and try to look smarter and more gracious than thier 'friends,' whom they don't really like.

My guess is that the publisher came up with that title because it would sell the book to people who aren't already familiar with your (brilliant) work... the kind of people who don't think much about underlying form, because the kind that do are probably already know you. Also, the former is by far the most common (==> more money).

...and finally, it does not ring of PL. So that's why.

...or, am I supposed to realize all that? Am I comitting the opposite of the situation with your hippie neigbors and the Buick by mistaking the droll as the earnest?

PL: No. But you're missing the fact that we have to sell the book. HHIFA was the only titled that worked for a variety of reasons. The book can be read on a variety of levels. I've given up trying to figure them all out. Hell, the marketing on this thing has been and will probably always be in flux of some sort. Some people take it as Fear and Loathing style gonzo humor. Some people take it as deep social commentary. Some people take it as a polemic on the folly of not doing what you want to do. I think it's all three and more and this title worked for it.

I guess one could also take it as double sarcasm. I hadn't thought of that.

We could give ourselves headaches dissecting it. I'd say the title, though not "PL" in some regards, is the only way to cover what it is. Ultimately, it's a cult book, and it's what's inside that counts (not to discount the great cover Bunny and Donika came up with), so this is all kind of academic.

Posted by: Jake at October 5, 2008 04:39 PM

It is a great cover. And what's inside is certainly the most important thing. And there's great writing inside.

I was just wondering about the title, that's all.

Pretty academic though. You know you can't keep academics from rubbing off on you a little when you're around them all the time. I should be working on math homework anyway instead of dissecting minutae on this addictive website. Can't wait for the book.

PL: Study hard. Facility with math keeps you away from law school.

Posted by: Jake at October 5, 2008 05:12 PM

Wow. I was reading the reviews for your book, and the only negative comments seem to come from other lawyers (by their pretentious speech in fucking Amazon comments) on how terrible you must be as a person.

I must say that you've obviously ruffled some feathers, keep up the good work.

PL: I thought the nicest criticism was from the woman who said she wanted to hate the book, but thought every kid looking at law school needed to read it. It's one of the three star reviews.

Posted by: ~Antar~ at November 7, 2008 03:09 PM

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